Which Batman Villain Would You Be? -Inception Style
by xt1me
Summary: Ariadne, Arthur and Eames discuss which Batman Villain they would be.


_AN: Just some musings I turned into a quick fic._

_When writing this I figured the Nolan Batman movies didn't exist in this world._

_As always: Don't own don't sue_

* * *

Despite the strangeness of Dreamshare, most jobs were not that bizarre. Dress a dream up where the mark is comfortable and nab the secrets as needed. Simple, though not always easy.

This was not one of those jobs.

They had actually been hired by the mark to provide a fantasy while at the same time they had to extract from him for the person who had really hired them before hand.

Which was why Ariadne, Eames and Arthur where meeting up for a practice run for this job.

A job which required the mark to play Batman and for them to be his villains.

Ariadne had insisted that they not tell each other who they would pick until after they perfected their characters and Eames had readily agreed. Arthur had needed surprisingly little persuasion to go along with it.

_#Dream_Dream_Dream#_

"Tada!" Ariadne exclaimed, showering everyone with leaves and petals. "I don't think the red hair really suits me and I had a hell of a time getting the outfit to look good and feel comfortable, but I think I turned out pretty well."

"I have to ask," Arthur said, "why Poison Ivy?"

"Don't think I pull it off?" She asked just to see him squirm and Eames smirked. "Believe it or not this is for practical reasons. I've learned my lesson about changing the environment and alerting the projections. But as Poison Ivy as long as I stick to plants..."

"The Mark's subconscious won't register you as an anomaly," Arthur realised, flipping his coin. "Well done."

"Why did you pick Two-Face?" she asked.

"Yes, I would have pegged you for Riddler or someone." Eames added.

Arthur made a face. "Unfortunately, thanks to that awful movie, most people think of Jim Carrey when they think of Riddler."

"And Two-Face doesn't make people think of Tommy Lee Jones?" Eames laughed. Arthur just glared at him, "I do not want to prance around in green lycra. Besides, like Ariadne, I'm just being practical. If I need to get rid of some projections, it doesn't matter if they're cops or thugs. As long as I flip a coin first I'm expected to shoot them. Though I'll probably have to remember to shoot them twice."

"Admit it," Eames needled, "You just don't want to wear something other than a suit."

"At least I put some thought into it." Arthur gestured vaguely at Eames who looked exactly as he had topside. "And you say _I_ have no imagination."

"Who are you?" Ariadne asked.

"You mean you can't tell?" Suddenly, where Eames had been standing there was a large figure seemingly made of mud.

"Lazy." Arthur said.

"I prefer to think of it as playing to my strengths." The mud like form slowly melted back into the form of Eames in an impressive display of control. Arthur remanded unimpressed.

"Honestly, what other character could I play?" Eames asked shifting into Arthur's Two-Face then to Ariadne's Poison Ivy. "After all, now I can be any character I want." he changed back to himself. "I'm curious, though. Who did you think I would pick?"

"Now that you mention it I don't know," Ariadne shrugged, "Bane maybe?"

Eames looked offended. "The steroid abusing thug?"

"Smart, steroid abusing thug," Arthur pointed out, "He broke the Bat remember."

"Nerd." Eames smiled.

"Research." Arthur insisted.

Ariadne interrupted before they could continue the argument they had been having since this job began. "What Batmen villain do you think Cobb would be?"

There was silence for a while as they all thought about it.

"Humm, difficult." Eames said.

"Mr. Freeze." Arthur said, decisively. Seeing the other's questioning looks he explained.

"Dom's an architect before he's an extractor. Like Ariadne, if he wants to alter something he'd simply need to stick to ice and he won't alert the dreamer."

"So it's got nothing to do with him obsessing over a dead wife then?" Eames asked with faux innocence.

Arthur glared at him. A glare he turned on Ariadne when she started to giggle.

"Sorry, sorry." She said quickly. "I'm just imagining Cobb making terrible ice puns."

Arthur rolled his eyes so she assumed she was forgiven. "Do Sato next." She demanded.

The other two shared a quick look and replied in unison. "Ra's al Ghul."

Ariadne though about it. "Super rich, taking over the world, was really old and is now young again (even if it was only a dream). You're right, Ra's al Ghul." She nodded, "Ok. So what about Yusuf?"

"That's a tough one." Eames turned to Arthur, "What villain uses chemicals do you know?"

"Well, " Arthur replied, "There's the Scarecrow maybe, but I don't think-"

He was interrupted by a familiar piece of music signifying the kick. But not, however, the music he had selected before they went under.

_~DanananananananaNanananananananaBatman!~_

"Eames! So help me, if we get into to a fight and there's even a hint of the words Bam, Biff or Pow I will-"

And the dream collapsed.


End file.
